Dealing with jealousy in your lesbian relationship
You really have to work hard if you want your relationship to last. But sometimes you encounter this little thing called jealousy.
Whether the threat of a third party is real or just plain insecurity, we all want to know how to handle that green-eyed monster.
As Cristina Marrero wrote in The Unsung Love Story: “You had to be willing to fight in order for a love story to last a lifetime.”
How to handle jealousy: Talk about your feelings
If you’re the one feeling the jealousy, talking to your partner about it helps.
A lot of us have so much pride. Instead of expressing how jealous we feel, we cloak it in other destructive behavior like inexplicable anger or making your partner jealous as well.
Being that you’re both women, and jealousy is part of our characters, it’s easier for her to understand.
Let her put herself in your shoes so she can empathize.
How to handle jealousy: Never lie
If it’s the other way around and you’re on the receiving end of your girlfriend’s jealousy, don’t give her a reason to mistrust.
Meaning: never, ever lie to your partner. Lying is one of the breeding grounds for jealousy.
If she caught you in a lie once, especially something as big as lying about where you went, this triggers an alert system in your girlfriend and she will always be on guard.
Tell her the truth. If you meet your old girlfriend, it’s better if you tell the truth.
This is especially if there’s nothing threatening about it. It may cause a fight, but what’s important is that you don’t lie.
How to handle jealousy: Trust one another
Now this is for both of you whether you’re the one experiencing jealousy or the other way around.
Give your girlfriend some credit if she’s faithful to you. Not all the girls she talks to is a threat. If they are, your girlfriend is human enough to know that it’s not right to act on it.
If she did act on it, then she’s not worth fighting for and you’re better off without her.
On your end, understand if your girlfriend is feeling jealous. It’s human to fear the loss of someone you love.
So try to see what you can remedy so you can pacify this fear. And always trust that this fear is real.
With these thoughts in mind, go and create a love story to last a lifetime, without jealousy dragging it down.