It was wonderful news at first: actress Ruby Rose had been cast as DC’s openly-gay comic book character Batwoman. Then she was accused of being “not gay enough” by certain members of the LGBTQ community.
This led her to deactivate her Twitter account, and shut down the comments on her Instagram account.
This makes us ask: are we seriously judging our own community members if they are or are not gay enough?
“Ruby Rose is not gay enough”
This story first started when it was announced last week that Rose had been cast as Kate Kane, Batwoman in The CW’s “Arrowverse.”
In the DC comics canon, Kate Kane is openly lesbian and Jewish.
Because of this, a number of LGBTQ peole started criticizing the casting choice because Rose isn’t of Jewish descent and isn’t gay enough to play a lesbian superhero. (Rose identifies as gender-fluid.)
In Rose’ last tweet before she left Twitter, she said: “Where on earth did ‘Ruby is not a lesbian therefore she can’t be Batwoman’ come from — has to be the funniest most ridiculous thing I’ve ever read.”
“I came out at 12? And have for the past 5 years had to deal with ‘she’s too gay’ how do y’all flip it like that? I didn’t change. I wish we would all support each other and our journeys,” she added.
Not gay enough & dealing with toxicity
This is not the first time a celebrity has had to deal with the toxic elements of our community.
Recently, Millie Bobbie Brown shut down her Twitter because an LGBTQ community in-joke spread outward to mainstream that falsely accused her of being homophobic, among others.
Now this time, it’s Rose who’s getting the toxic end from a community that prides itself on its inclusivity.
As Clare McBride, writing in SyfyWire about the issue, pointed out, “We need to see so many different stories of what being queer means, because being queer means so many things and takes on so many forms.”
“It’s important for queer folks of all ages to see their own stories reflected back, and know that if their story is a little different than the standard coming out narrative, then it doesn’t make them any less queer,” McBride warned.
How does “not gay enough” look like?
We also need to think about how we’re judging Rose because she doesn’t look or act “gay enough.”
Most of us realize who we are learning on our own. That means we have different learning processes.
As Rachel Charlene Lewis wrote in Pride.com back in 2016, “Mainstream gay media made me feel like I had to pick a side: femme, or butch. And of course there’s 100% nothing wrong with identifying with either.”
“But I don’t identify as femme, butch, or really as anything beyond just vaguely — but definitely — queer,” Lewis said.
“It took a lot of reading, a re-education around what my queerness actually meant, and, most importantly, meant to me, but I was able to get closer to embracing my sexuality in a way that felt real instead of forced,” she said.
Quite right. For many of who who’ve been scarred by the “straight” world for being judged constantly, who are we to judge other members of our community what is “gay enough”?